Words typed behind a screen don’t feel real to the person writing them — but they are painfully real to the person reading them. Cyberbullying isn’t harmless, and pretending it is has consequences.
Cyberbullying is at an all time high, and people need to learn how their harmful words affect people.
If you don’t think cyberbullying is a big deal, you’re part of the problem. Nearly half of U.S. teens have experienced some form of cyberbullying. And it isn’t limited to young people — it affects adults, too.
Beyond youth, the issue is widespread: 41% of adults report experiencing online hate, and 95% of content creators say they have been affected by cyberbullying.
Online bullying is not new. It has simply evolved over the past decade. When social media first emerged, hate spread through chat rooms, email chains and even fake MySpace pages created to harass individuals.
Today, people send hateful messages through direct messages on Instagram, TikTok and other platforms. The methods have changed, but the patterns remain the same. Instead of disappearing, online bullying has become more strategic and more accessible.
I have received rude comments on my social media posts, but once in middle school, I received a direct message from someone I didn’t know. They made fun of how I looked, and those very words followed me into my adulthood.
Not only do people spread hate through these private messages, but they also create anonymous accounts to attack others in comment sections without facing consequences. This behavior reflects what psychologists call the “online disinhibition effect,” where the lack of face-to-face interaction reduces empathy and makes people more likely to say things they would never say in person.
Utah hate
If you scroll through TikTok long enough, you will see at least one video that hates on people from Utah. I have yet to see any other state criticized with the same intensity that people from Utah face online.
Many hate comments and videos target girls for their Utah curls or the way they dress. The main issue with this kind of hate is that it targets real people with real feelings. Many of these videos feature high school students and young adults — people who are still figuring out who they are and how they want to express themselves.
The hate toward Utah isn’t new. When I was 14 years old, it became a trend to diss people from Utah simply for being from Utah. Then, in 2020, criticism of dirty sodas, the Utah culture and the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints culture became widespread, turning cultural traits into targets for hate.
Berlin Beverly, a TikTok creator from Utah, has been targeted in many of these hate videos and has spoken out about how cruel the videos and comments can be. In one video, she said that bullying and body shaming are not acceptable, yet the comments were still filled with hateful remarks directed at her and others.
Seeing videos or comments like these makes me sad for anyone involved. Why is it so easy to get behind a screen and reflect your insecurities on another human being? You may not want to dress like them or like the same things as them, but it should never give someone a reason to be hateful.
If you’re not from Utah, people are often shocked by the culture here. When “The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives” came out, viewers were quick to talk about how different life in Utah seemed. The show led some to believe that everyone has Botox, no one drinks coffee, or even that using ketamine is common.
But if you actually live here, you know that isn’t true for everyone. Media formats that chase views tend to highlight extremes, because unusual lifestyles attract attention. That’s why Utah has become such an easy target for criticism; outsiders are only seeing a narrow glimpse of a few people’s lives, not the full reality of the state’s culture.
What we can do
Hate will continue to grow if it goes unchallenged. People need to stand up for themselves and for others, because positivity goes much farther than hate. Supporting one another matters, and when we see online hate, we shouldn’t ignore it — we should report it, call it out and refuse to treat it as normal.
The saying “kindness goes a long way” is the best advice I would give to someone. Don’t use hate as a way to get your revenge. Educate people on how words dig deep, and that there is so much more to life than hating behind a screen.
I have reported videos that show obvious signs of hate, and more than half the time, TikTok tells me that there are no signs of hate on the video. Take the Utah videos, for example. One has over 1.2 million likes. It angers me because it brings in views and platforms continue to stay quiet.
Social media platforms need to be held accountable for allowing hate to circulate so easily. If they care about their users as much as they say they do, then they need to prove it.
For real change to happen, we need to start holding both people and companies accountable. Leave reviews on app stores, speak out on social media, and most importantly, show up for the people around you. Be the support system you would hope to have if you were in their place.
