As a little girl, I imagined having a fairy tale love story and finding a guy who would sweep me off my feet. In reality, dating rarely looks like that.
Dating in the real world is nothing like the movies. It revolves around dating apps, Snapchat and talking stages. When things do not work out, people often get ghosted.
Ghosting, simply put, means suddenly cutting off communication with someone and avoiding them altogether.
Our generation needs to learn how to handle discomfort and conflict. Ghosting does not make life easier, especially when you still have to see that person in class or on campus. It only makes things more awkward, which is why communication matters.
Ghosting culture has become common among Generation Z. Instead of having awkward conversations, many people choose to ignore the other person.
I am not innocent in this, either. I have ghosted people because it felt like the easiest option. I did not want to explain why I did not think things were going to work after one date. It felt too awkward to say, “I think you’re great, but I do not like the way you hold yourself.” So instead, I said nothing at all.
Being the ghoster is easy. You do not have to deal with an uncomfortable conversation. But being the person who gets ghosted is painful.
After experiencing being ghosted, it made me rethink ghosting. Ghosting can be situational-based; it is OK to ghost someone when they are being creepy, but talking every day and having meaningful conversations requires an explanation.
From personal experience, being ghosted can have a real emotional impact. I was once set up on a double date and started spending time with a guy regularly. We talked often, and he seemed interested in me, even though neither of us had clearly said how we felt. Then one day, I never heard from him again with no explanation.
It made me feel like there was something wrong with me because he was too uncomfortable to say to my face. I spent nights talking with friends, replaying every interaction and trying to figure out where I had gone wrong. I reread our texts, wondering whether I had misread something or had come across too strong.
Sometimes I still think about that situation because if there is something I need to work on, I would have wanted to know. It makes me think that if one person could leave without explanation, why wouldn’t the next person?
There is nothing wrong with not feeling a connection with someone. That is the point of dating: meeting new people, going on dates and figuring out if you are compatible.
Ghosting burns that bridge. You cannot talk to the person again without it feeling awkward. If you communicate, it may only be uncomfortable for a few days. Ghosting can make it awkward for much longer.
Modern dating has made ghosting easier. People meet through dating apps or by sliding into someone’s direct messages. Real connections can feel harder to build. Gen Z has become more hesitant to have real conversations. Through a phone, it is easier to handle rejection — all it takes is an unfollow and a message to someone new.
Communication helps build healthy relationships and personal growth. It is essential to talk about how you are feeling, especially in college. This is the time to learn who you are, who you want to be and the type of people you want to surround yourself with.
As a little girl, I imagined a fairy tale kind of love. Now I realize it is not about grand gestures or perfect moments — it is about something much simpler. It is about honesty, even when it is uncomfortable. Because real connections are not ruined by awkward conversations.
