Lost Arts: Chivalry has lost its savor

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In this millennial society, it couldn’t be more obvious that chivalry has lost its savor. 

Unlike leftover pizza, which seems to taste better as tomorrow’s lunch, chivalry has not aged well. The art of courtship, respect and being a gentleman are missing links in a millennial’s DNA. 

I was raised in a home where women, especially my mother and sisters, were to be treated as if they were angels. Any verbiage or action directed toward them was to show some level of respect and love. These were principles my father tried to instill into me knowing one day I would become a man and marry an angel myself, which I did.

I was taught to open doors, pay for the date, and give my jacket to the girl when the weather was bitter. Call me old-fashioned, but actions like these are a part of who I am.

Yet, these actions are considered to be relics to the generation that relies on text messaging as a means to hook-up. In a society where marriage is no longer the ultimate goal, chivalry may have lost its purpose. 

What would cause for such a shift in society? Laziness? Feminism? Expectations? The list could consist of an infinite amount of reasons but I just want to focus on these three. 


To put it simply, this generation is lazy. Technology has been the biggest contributor to laziness. It has brainwashed today’s society, especially millennials, to expect instant gratification. The idea of holding everything you possibly could want in your hand deters the need of human interaction. 

An individual’s relationships are maintained by instant messaging, tweeting, and posting pictures to Instagram. There is no time for face-to-face interactions with others because the time is filled with limited 140 character messages. 

These types of mannerisms keep chivalry from thriving. Men resort to texting when asking a girl out or fail to take a few extra steps to open the door for their dates. Do men even take the time to plan well-thought-out dates? Maybe all they care about is what will happen once the date starts to come to a conclusion. 

Whatever the individual case may be for today’s generation, laziness will certainly not help millennials end up with the person they desire most. If I was lazy when it came to courting my wife, there would be no way I’d have anything on my ring finger. 


Ever since feminism took off, people have fought for the equality and empowerment of women. I am not necessarily talking about radicals but merely about the emergence of power women have gained in today’s society. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am all for equality among the sexes. Yet, it has arrived to the point where women have made it more difficult for chivalry to survive. 

The biggest factor in this could be women’s need for independence and the ability to do everything on their own. They desire to use their liberty to refuse help from men. They can open their own doors, carry their own grocery bags, and pay for their own meal. Maybe to some women, chivalry may be limiting their chance for independence.


 Today’s expectations have changed, thus forcing chivalry to suffer. For some, it is no longer expected that men pay for dinner or walk his damsel to the front door. The whole idea of “ladies first” has grown old to some. Heck, if I were a lady, I would be jumping all over that. 

As sad as it is to say, today’s culture seems too filled with the notion that women can be treated with less respect and men can get away with it. Some guys out there merely view women as objects, something that can fulfill their sexual appetite. By having this be their only expectation, chivalry is no where to be found.  

This idea can be flipped the other direction too where when women no longer expect things from men. Maybe women don’t want to play their role when it comes to chivalry. By doing so, it may make things easier and a lot simpler, thus giving the perfect scapegoat for men everywhere.

It is unfortunate that chivalry is losing its savor. Who knows. Maybe I am one of a few that still agrees with this notion.