To Boldly Go: Boys need to man up

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If there was one thing I would change to make this year better,    I’d change men. 

   Or rather, I’d change their dating habits.

   It is a tragedy to see such a multitude of men sunk into their studies or wallowing in work who are frightened of their feminine counterparts.

   Women like to date. We like to date because it makes us feel special, and we like men who make us feel special.  If you treat a girl like a princess, then she will automatically assume you’re a prince and not some slimy frog. 

   Some might say women can ask men out, and while that’s true, it is a far cry from ideal. Honestly, if a man doesn’t date at all, or only dates when he’s asked out by women, then I’m going to assume that he lacks the guts to ask a girl out. Women like confident men, and cowardliness makes a man much less attractive.

   Are you frightened by potential rejection? Billy Joel said he really wished he “was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection.” 

   Believe me, women wish the same of you. This is something that separates the men from the boys. Lest you think I’m man-bashing, relax — I’m actually boy-bashing. Boys are crippled by their fear, but men rise above it. 

The best way to overcome your fear of rejection is to practice. Ask out female friends before you ask out your crush. Ask out the girls you talk to in class or at work. Dates aren’t proposals of marriage, after all. They are just a fun, casual way to socialize and flirt.

Start casual: “Hey, it’s pretty hot outside. Want to go get some frozen yogurt with me after class?” “Hey, can I take you to Costa Vida tomorrow for lunch?” “Hey, ‘The Bourne Legacy’ is playing and I’ve heard it’s great. Come see it with me at 7 on Friday night?”

For a casual meal like lunch, dessert or breakfast, it’s best to ask a few days in advance. Dinner or activity dates deserve a week’s warning or more.  

If you are asking her to a dance, don’t you dare ask any later than two weeks in advance. Any later and the woman will assume that she was your last resort and turn you down. Yes, I’ve done that too. Ask well in advance because women need the extra time — trust me. 

Above all, never ever ask over text. Never ask over Facebook. I have no qualms about turning down any male who asks thusly. I’ve done it before, and I will doubtless do it again. Why?               

If a male is too frightened to ask me out to my face or over a phone call, then he is a boy and not a man. I’m in college — I have no time for boys. Women in college are looking for men to date — not boys to mother.

Dates are as fun and as short as you make them. They can be free, and to be completely honest, there’s not much to do in St. George other than date. 

Men, please build up your courage. Be bold! Ask a lady on a date. Ask two or three — if you dare.

If you think I’m being unfair toward men, relax. Women share the blame, and like you, they will be getting a column all to themselves. To that end, I need your input.

Tell me what makes you decide which girls to date, and what makes you want to ask a girl out. See my advice for women so you know when a girl is hoping you’ll ask her out. Share your pick-up lines and strategies on the Dixie Sun News website to help out your less gutsy brethren.  

Above all, don’t be afraid to ask.