Despite the many people who will disagree, I’m here to tell you that, yes, it is OK to date your friend’s ex.
If your friend hasn’t dated that guy or girl in years, and has no feeling for his or her ex, go for it. Be realistic. If your friend went out with this ex twice and is married now, he or she probably won’t mind.
I don’t mean to sound insensitive here. I’m just so tired of friendships ending over a guy who one friend hasn’t seen in months, even years. I’ve seen best friends tear each other in numerous fights because Friend A decided to date Friend B’s ex.
I’m not saying you should sneak behind your friend’s back and hide it from her. It’s not Romeo and Juliet, guys. If the break up was recent, ask your friend if he or she is OK with you dating his or her ex.
Generally, from my experiences, after six months, if the relationship wasn’t too serious, then your friend has probably moved on. At least your friend’s feelings for his or her ex are probably gone.
It’s just common courtesy to let your friend know your plans. All you have to say is, “Hey, I’m thinking about going out with your ex and wanted to see how you feel about it.”
Most people will argue here and say, “Well, your friend might just be lying.” For one, if you’ve been friends long enough for it to actually matter if you’re dating his or her ex or not, then you can get a pretty good reading if your friend is lying. For another thing, this is your friend I’m talking about; why does he or she need to lie?
Another thing to take into consideration before trying to date your friend’s ex is the circumstances in which your friend and his or her ex broke up. Did the pair just say it wasn’t working out and just went on to be platonic?
In general, friends want friends to be happy. So, if this is the case, most likely your friend won’t mind that you’re dating his or her ex.
However, did your friend and his or her ex break up because the ex cheated on your friend? Maybe it was something equally bad, such as he or she stole your friend’s life savings or hurt your friend physically and emotionally. Then, it is definitely never ever OK to date this person, no matter how much you may like him or her.
Besides, if this person did all this to your friend, what makes you think he or she wouldn’t do the same to you?
Some people will say dating your friend’s ex is disrespectful and against whatever bro or girl code you follow.
Ultimately, you have to make the decision that feels right to you. Go with your gut, but be smart about it. You know whether or not your friend is 100 percent OK with you dating his or her ex.
