That’s What She Said: Dating norms can, should be broken

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   Women are just as capable of asking men out as men are at asking women.

   Nowhere is it written that a woman can’t ask a man out on a date.

   In most high schools, there are dances where the girls get to ask the guy, and it’s the accepted culture. No one questions it really, and the dances can be a blast. It’s called the “Sadie Hawkins,” or “Sadies.”

   There is no reason why that high school dance culture shouldn’t carry over to day-to-day dating etiquette. 

   For Sadies, girls would plan a day date for their group of friends and their dates on the day of the dance. They would all go and get pictures later that evening and then dance the night away to a local disc jockey’s music. It was fun, and the date happened because girls asked boys out.

   I was asked out by the girl; I was picked up by the girl; I was taken out to dinner by the girl, and the girl even paid the bill. Usually these things are what a man would do on a date, but it doesn’t mater.

   When I was dating my now-wife, we would argue over who would pay the bill. We both wanted to pay. I wanted to because I am the man, and that’s the traditional etiquette, and she wanted to because she felt bad I always bought lunch. I would have never asked her to pay a bill, but when she would fight me over it, I wouldn’t mind as much. It’s not just women, though. I wouldn’t ask anyone to pay for me.

   The same principle applies to friends or coworkers. People don’t ask others to buy them anything but aren’t mad when others voluntarily do so.

   Men should sometimes take the initiative in asking women out, driving and paying on dates. If a woman is tired of waiting, though, and feels like the man she likes hasn’t noticed her yet, she should take control and ask him out. I don’t see why she shouldn’t.

   I don’t think this should be a common practice necessarily, but women have as much of a say in relationship matters as men do.

   It is OK for a woman to make the first move and ask a man out. If the man then doesn’t put forth any effort after the date, the woman might be better off moving on because the man may not be interested. 

   Not all men share my opinion. I’m sure some men might think it’s weird for the woman to ask them out, but there are not many. A lot of men would take it as a boost to their ego that a woman likes them enough to ask them out. 

   In a culture where it is more and more acceptable for women to do whatever they want, there is no reason that dating should be any different.